J.T. scrambled after me and caught up before I\u2019d gone more than a dozen steps.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat the hell is wrong with you?\u201d he demanded quietly.\u00a0 \u201cMatt\u2019s trying to be proactive about shit and you\u2019re throwing it back in his face.\u201d<\/p>\n
I shook my head.\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019m not doing that.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou are.\u00a0 Aren\u2019t you the one who said something about everyone needing to learn how to defend themselves in the first place?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou\u2019re confusing me with my husband.\u00a0 We are<\/i> still two distinct individuals.\u201d<\/p>\n
J.T. snorted humorlessly and shook his head.\u00a0 \u201cBelieve me, I\u2019m more than well aware of that.\u00a0 What\u2019s eating at you, Mar?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cDamned if I know,\u201d I muttered, squeezing my eyes shut for a bare moment.\u00a0 \u201cThis isn\u2019t like me.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNo, it\u2019s not\u2014hence the concern.\u201d\u00a0 J.T. touched my shoulder lightly.\u00a0 \u201cI know that the fighting didn\u2019t go as planned\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s not that.\u201d\u00a0 But was it what I saw in the middle of all of that?\u00a0 Maybe.<\/i>\u00a0 My lips thinned and I stayed quiet as we walked to the row of holly bushes that marked the edge of the settlement.\u00a0 They\u2019d filled out nicely since we planted them, thick and full, all bright green leaves and red berries against rough wooden stems.<\/p>\n
\u201cAre you sure it\u2019s not?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m sure.\u201d\u00a0 I tried to stifle a sigh as I crouched in the snow to snip off a few sprigs of holly from the first bush.\u00a0 \u201cMaybe I\u2019m just out of sorts, Jay.\u00a0 I don\u2019t think it\u2019s a different kind of out of sorts from usual, though.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cAnd that has absolutely nothing to do with the fight that we just won?\u201d<\/p>\n
I winced.\u00a0 \u201cMaybe it does.\u00a0 I almost got Phelan killed.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cHow do you figure?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIf I hadn\u2019t suggested he walk out there and assassinate Cariocecus, he would\u2019ve been safely behind the walls with the rest of us and he wouldn\u2019t have gotten hurt.\u00a0 This time it was my fault he got hurt and that sucks.\u00a0 It sucks pretty hard.\u201d<\/p>\n
J.T. winced.\u00a0 \u201cBut he seems pretty okay now.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI wouldn\u2019t know,\u201d I murmured.\u00a0 \u201cI haven\u2019t seen him.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cHe\u2019s not avoiding you.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cAre you sure about that?\u201d<\/p>\n
J.T. smiled wryly.\u00a0 \u201cFairly.\u00a0 We went hunting for Thom earlier to put a bug in his ear.\u00a0 And Thordin, and your brother.\u00a0 Not entirely certain why\u2014I think he was going a little crazy cooped up in the room.\u201d<\/p>\n
I shook my head slowly.\u00a0 \u201cJacqueline said that she didn\u2019t think he\u2019d be up for a couple days.\u00a0 What the hell happened?\u00a0 Did she manage to heal him more than she thought she\u2019d be able to?\u201d<\/p>\n
He winced again.\u00a0 \u201cNot\u2026quite.\u201d\u00a0 He crouched down next to me, his voice quiet.\u00a0 \u201cThere\u2026there was a ghost.\u201d<\/p>\n
I straightened slightly, blinking at him.\u00a0 \u201cA ghost?\u201d\u00a0 Again?\u00a0 Is he some kind of magnet for all things weird?<\/i>\u00a0 I was beginning to think that he was\u2014he had to be, given everything that had happened to him over the course of a lifetime, even in the course of the short term.\u00a0 \u201cWhat kind of ghost?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThe unsettling but not terrifying kind,\u201d J.T. said with a wry smile.\u00a0 \u201cHe knew who she was when I told him her name.\u00a0 She\u2026I don\u2019t know if she was actually a ghost or some kind of spirit, Mar, but she healed him more than Jac had managed.\u00a0 I don\u2019t understand what kind of power it was that she used, but I could feel it in my bones.\u201d<\/p>\n
My brow furrowed and I stared at nothing for a long moment, fingers curling around the shears in one hand and a holly branch in the other.\u00a0 \u201cThere\u2019s too many players in this game,\u201d I said quietly.\u00a0 \u201cI don\u2019t like it, Jay.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m more worried about the day we know who all of them are, Mar.\u00a0 That\u2019s the day we don\u2019t have any hope left.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cHow do you figure?\u201d<\/p>\n
J.T. shook his head, smiling grimly.\u00a0 \u201cThat\u2019s the day we don\u2019t have any more happy surprises coming to save the day.\u201d<\/p>\n
I had to admit that he was right.\u00a0 When he put it that way, I wasn\u2019t sure I liked the idea of knowing it all, either.<\/p>\n
\u201cWell,\u201d I finally said quietly. \u201cI guess we have to hope that day never comes.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cExactly.\u201d\u00a0 J.T. squeezed my shoulder and straightened.\u00a0 \u201cDo you need any help?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNo,\u201d I murmured quietly.\u00a0 \u201cI think I\u2019m okay.\u00a0 Tala and Thom might, though.\u00a0 Thom was trying to wrangle her into making something a little more festive for dinner the next few nights.\u201d<\/p>\n
J.T. grinned.\u00a0 \u201cI think I can help with that.\u201d\u00a0 He squeezed my shoulder one more time before he lumbered away. I sat back against my heels in the snow and watched him walk away.<\/p>\n
Everything was starting to change again and I wasn\u2019t sure if I liked it one bit.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
J.T. scrambled after me and caught up before I\u2019d gone more than a dozen steps. \u201cWhat the hell is wrong with you?\u201d he demanded quietly.\u00a0 \u201cMatt\u2019s trying to be proactive about shit and you\u2019re throwing it back in his face.\u201d … Continue reading