We found the second cookfire abandoned except for J.T., who sat next to it with both hands wrapped around a mug of something steaming, a blanket pulled tight around his shoulders.\u00a0 I blinked in surprise to see him and he glanced up toward us at our approach, looking tired and haggard with deep, bruise-colored shadows beneath his eyes.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou look like shit,\u201d I said.<\/p>\n
\u201cI feel like it, too.\u201d\u00a0 He stretched a little and watched as Neve and I settled down next to the fire across from him.\u00a0 \u201cWhat brings you ladies to my quiet corner of the tent?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat brings you all the way out here?\u00a0 Usually you\u2019re by the other fire.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNot today,\u201d he said.\u00a0 \u201cI was out in the mess and this fire was closer to where I came back inside.\u00a0 The rest are all off doing god knows what, which means I have a few minutes of peace.\u201d<\/p>\n
Take it when and where you can get it, I guess.<\/i><\/p>\n
\u201cYou sound like you\u2019re being pulled in as many directions as Thom and Marin,\u201d Neve said as she settled in and gazed longingly at the kettle that sat near the fire.\u00a0 I took pity on her and poured two cups of the hot, strong tea, one for each of us.\u00a0 She took her mug and cradled it much like J.T., peering over the rim toward him.<\/p>\n
\u201cA little bit,\u201d J.T. admitted, casting a wary glance in my direction.\u00a0 \u201cFor all the ghosts keep telling me they can\u2019t help us anymore, they\u2019re certainly still around and chatty.\u201d<\/p>\n
I shivered slightly.\u00a0 \u201cIncluding \u00c9riu, I\u2019m guessing?\u201d\u00a0 I didn\u2019t want to be hateful or be uncomfortable because I knew she was still lurking around.\u00a0 That wasn\u2019t what I wanted at all, especially because she had been so important to Phelan in the past and having her spirit near was such a comfort to him.<\/p>\n
At the same time, I couldn\u2019t help but get the shivers every time I thought about her, if only because I\u2019d raised her from a child in another life, a life I could see in dreams and snatches of memory.<\/p>\n
She\u2019s not leaving until the children are born.<\/i>\u00a0 I glanced toward Neve.\u00a0 Maybe not even for a long time after.<\/i><\/p>\n
Can you handle that eventuality, Marin?\u00a0 Can you do it?<\/i>\u00a0 I bit my lip.\u00a0 I wasn\u2019t sure that I could.<\/p>\n
\u201cDo you want me to lie and say no?\u201d\u00a0 J.T. asked, staring at me over the fire and the rim of his mug.\u00a0 I managed to smile.<\/p>\n
\u201cNo,\u201d I said softly.\u00a0 \u201cThere are just some things I have to accept and her presence, I guess, is just one of those things.\u00a0 It\u2019s just hard and strange.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cShe understands that,\u201d J.T. said.\u00a0 \u201cThat\u2019s why she tries not to stay too near when you\u2019re with him.\u00a0 But she loves him and she wants to protect him, too.\u00a0 Just like she wants to protect you and Thom an the children.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOf course,\u201d I murmured, staring at the fire.\u00a0 Neve reached over and squeezed my arm.<\/p>\n
\u201cSome things are still hard, huh?\u00a0 Even for you.\u201d<\/p>\n
I laughed weakly.\u00a0 \u201cYeah.\u00a0 Even for me.\u201d\u00a0 Especially for me, since I can see some of the paths twisting, where they\u2019ll go.<\/i><\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Especially for me who dreams more of the past and the future than the present and fears what tomorrow may hold because of all I\u2019ve seen and all I know.<\/i><\/p>\n
I took a deep breath and exhaled it slowly, looking toward Neve and trying to master my storming thoughts.\u00a0 \u201cSo,\u201d I said with a measure of forced cheer.\u00a0 \u201cTell me about how Thordin came back from the dead.\u201d<\/p>\n
Neve looked stricken for a moment, then started to laugh.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
We found the second cookfire abandoned except for J.T., who sat next to it with both hands wrapped around a mug of something steaming, a blanket pulled tight around his shoulders.\u00a0 I blinked in surprise to see him and he … Continue reading