{"id":3190,"date":"2017-04-07T00:00:09","date_gmt":"2017-04-07T04:00:09","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/awakenings.embklitzke.com\/?p=3190"},"modified":"2017-04-06T18:03:19","modified_gmt":"2017-04-06T22:03:19","slug":"eight-02-3","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/awakenings.embklitzke.com\/?p=3190","title":{"rendered":"Eight – 02"},"content":{"rendered":"

[This post is from Hecate’s point of view.]<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sorry,\u201d Hecate managed in a rasping whisper. \u201cThis is all my fault. He\u2019s coming here because I didn\u2019t give him the answer he wanted when he wanted it. My past is catching up with me and I\u2019m not the only one that\u2019s going to face the consequences, but it should<\/em> be me and only me. No one else should suffer because of me. I\u2019ve brought too much suffering on people as it is.\u201d<\/p>\n

Marin\u2019s infant son squirmed, letting out a quiet sound. Marin drew back slightly, shifting how he was laying in the sling against her chest. She kept one hand on Hecate\u2019s arm, her touch warm and strangely comforting.<\/p>\n

Hecate reached up to mop at her eyes with the cuff of her sleeve, her throat painfully tight. \u201cI should leave.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMatt\u2019s not about to let you go and truth be told, neither am I,\u201d Marin said, her voice firm but gentle. \u201cI\u2019m not exactly keen on ever sending anyone away when they need help.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBut I\u2019ve put all of you in danger,\u201d Hecate whispered. She stared at the baby for a long moment. \u201cI\u2019m putting your son in danger.\u201d<\/p>\n

Marin slowly lifted her son out of his carrying sling, cradling him in one arm for a moment. She stared down at the baby boy, his huge blue eyes seeming to drink in everything in the room. Hecate swallowed, uncomfortable as the newborn\u2019s gaze fell on her, oddly steady.<\/p>\n

\u201cThe world put him in danger,\u201d Marin said after a long silence. \u201cBeing born after the end of everything has put him in danger. That\u2019s not your doing, Hecate. You can\u2019t blame yourself for it\u2014or at least, you shouldn\u2019t<\/em> blame yourself for it.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI can\u2019t help it,\u201d Hecate said, tearing her gaze away from the baby. \u201cI wish I could. I just\u2014there\u2019s a guilt that\u2019s inside me that just keeps growing, a voice inside my head that\u2019s just screaming<\/em> that this\u2014like everything else\u2014is all my fault and look at what I\u2019ve done and I\u2019m awful and worthless except for causing trouble and I\u2014\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHecate.\u201d<\/p>\n

She clammed up, pressing her fist against her mouth and squeezing her eyes shut. Voices clamored in her head, repeating everything she\u2019d just said and more. Marin squeezed her arm.<\/p>\n

\u201cI know it\u2019s hard,\u201d she said softly. \u201cBut you don\u2019t have to listen to them. I know it\u2019s hard and they\u2019re there and they won\u2019t shut up\u2014not yet\u2014but we\u2019re here and I\u2019m<\/em> here and I\u2019m telling you that this isn\u2019t your fault and you don\u2019t have to go anywhere and we\u2019re in this together and that\u2019s not<\/em> your fault.\u201d Her voice softened further and she shifted from sitting in front of Hecate to sitting next to her on the bed, then slid her arm around the other woman\u2019s shoulders.<\/p>\n

\u201cMy brother loves you,\u201d Marin said gently. \u201cNothing else matters. We take care of our own, Hecate. And you\u2019re part of us now. We\u2019ll take care of you, too. I promise.<\/p>\n

\u201cI promise<\/em>.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

[This post is from Hecate’s point of view.] \u201cI\u2019m sorry,\u201d Hecate managed in a rasping whisper. \u201cThis is all my fault. He\u2019s coming here because I didn\u2019t give him the answer he wanted when he wanted it. My past is … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[240,249,14],"tags":[150,171,170,194,152,149,148,168,147,165,200,146],"class_list":["post-3190","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-book-6","category-chapter-08-book-6","category-story","tag-awakenings","tag-fantasy","tag-fiction","tag-hecate","tag-marin-astoris","tag-original-fiction","tag-post-apocalyptic","tag-serial","tag-serial-fiction","tag-story","tag-thomas-merlin-ambrose","tag-web-fiction"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p1EBlN-Ps","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/awakenings.embklitzke.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3190","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/awakenings.embklitzke.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/awakenings.embklitzke.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/awakenings.embklitzke.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/awakenings.embklitzke.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3190"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/awakenings.embklitzke.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3190\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3191,"href":"http:\/\/awakenings.embklitzke.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3190\/revisions\/3191"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/awakenings.embklitzke.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3190"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/awakenings.embklitzke.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3190"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/awakenings.embklitzke.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3190"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}