{"id":3356,"date":"2017-09-20T00:00:53","date_gmt":"2017-09-20T04:00:53","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/awakenings.embklitzke.com\/?p=3356"},"modified":"2017-09-19T21:52:52","modified_gmt":"2017-09-20T01:52:52","slug":"twenty-two-03-3","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/awakenings.embklitzke.com\/?p=3356","title":{"rendered":"Twenty-two – 03"},"content":{"rendered":"

[This post is from Marin’s point of view.]<\/em><\/p>\n

We lapsed into silence for a few minutes. Thordin\u2019s gaze wandered, eventually settling on Lin\u2019s basket. I could sense an ache in him, something that went beyond anything physical, something that lay in the depths of his very soul.<\/p>\n

I exhaled a quiet breath and it was enough to draw his attention, at least momentarily.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cJac\u2019s with Sif?\u201d<\/p>\n

He closed his eyes and nodded. \u201cShe said she wasn\u2019t going to leave until she woke up. Is that supposed to be reassuring?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIs it?\u201d I asked, taking another sip of coffee.<\/p>\n

\u201cYes. No. Dammit, I don\u2019t know.\u201d He pressed the heels of his hands against his eyes, groaning. \u201cI don\u2019t fucking know and it\u2019s making me crazy that I don\u2019t know if it is or not. I feel like I should be there but at the same time I know she\u2019s right and I need to clear my head but she\u2019s staying with her and that makes me worry that much more.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cEndless feedback loop,\u201d I said, then smiled weakly. \u201cIt takes some breaking. I know how you feel, though. Thom\u2019s out cold right now because of whatever the hell changed with the camazotzi<\/em>\u2014or changed with him. I\u2019m not sure which it is.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cEither,\u201d Thordin said. \u201cBoth.\u201d He sighed and picked up his mug again, staring into its depths for a few seconds before he finally got up and moved closer to me, settling down on the opposite side of Lin\u2019s basket. He stared at the infant for a few seconds, then reached a hand toward him, one finger trailing down the side of my son\u2019s face. Lin stirred, but didn\u2019t wake.<\/p>\n

I smiled faintly. \u201cYou\u2019ll have a chance, Thordin.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI had a chance,\u201d he murmured quietly. \u201cAnd then I got myself killed. Who knows what happened to the son I never knew.\u201d He glanced up at me, smiling a sad little smile. \u201cI don\u2019t know if that chance will come again, or if I\u2019ll ever know what it would be like.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t rule it out,\u201d I whispered.<\/p>\n

Thordin shrugged slightly. \u201cIt seems like it\u2019s pretty far away now. Maybe it\u2019ll happen. Maybe it won\u2019t. If I lose her…\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou won\u2019t.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou don\u2019t know that.\u201d<\/p>\n

I reached over and grasped his arm, squeezing. \u201cYes,\u201d I said, my voice firm. \u201cYes, I do. You\u2019re not going to lose her.\u201d<\/p>\n

He met my gaze, held it. He swallowed hard, twice, apparently seeing something in my eyes that frightened him. He looked away, back toward the fire.<\/p>\n

His head bobbed once in a nod and I let go of his arm.<\/p>\n

We lapsed into silence again, neither willing to break it\u2014not quite, not yet. It was a fragile thing, that silence, his hope, my resolve\u2014but it was a thing that we needed in that moment, a thing that neither of us was willing to sacrifice.<\/p>\n

So we sat in silence, listening to the sound of a crackling fire and a sleeping infant, until the sound of footsteps heralded an end to the moment.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

[This post is from Marin’s point of view.] We lapsed into silence for a few minutes. Thordin\u2019s gaze wandered, eventually settling on Lin\u2019s basket. I could sense an ache in him, something that went beyond anything physical, something that lay … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[240,270,14],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3356","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-book-6","category-chapter-22-book-6","category-story"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p1EBlN-S8","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/awakenings.embklitzke.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3356","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/awakenings.embklitzke.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/awakenings.embklitzke.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/awakenings.embklitzke.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/awakenings.embklitzke.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3356"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/awakenings.embklitzke.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3356\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3357,"href":"http:\/\/awakenings.embklitzke.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3356\/revisions\/3357"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/awakenings.embklitzke.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3356"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/awakenings.embklitzke.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3356"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/awakenings.embklitzke.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3356"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}